A Pirate's Life for Me
by RumAndNukaCola
Summary: Pirate characters from an RP - Caleb and Alex's adventures, lots of oneshots, lots of alternete situations I'm tweaking. Not a lot of canon characters here, just indulging myself/RP buddies.


**So, I've been toying with possible ideas of how Alex and Caleb met. Here's one of them!**

**More to come~ 3**

**

* * *

**

Caleb smiled as he watched the figure in the end of the vault. She hadn't noticed him yet, she was too busy hacking into one of the many small safes.

"...Finally caught up to you." He laughed, the woman freezing. "It's about time, too. I've only been chasing you... what, two hours? Around a fucking banking ship? Not bad." He lifted up his shotgun, aiming it at her. He was far away enough to avoid her attacking him, but even this stranger knew by now that he had the aim to kill her. "Hand it over. Come on. I ain't got all fuckin' day."

The figure didn't respond. She stayed where she was, kneeling down in front of the safe, hacking away. He stepped forward.

"Hey! You hear me? What are you, fuckin' deaf?"

The figure held her hand up, her index finger in the air. "One sec!" She snapped, frustration in her voice. Caleb blinked. What was with her? He had a fucking _shotgun _pointed at her and she was telling _him_ to wait?

"...You ain't in no position to give me orders! Turn around and fucking hand it over!"

The figure's head tilted back ever so slightly and she let out a frustrated groan. "If you'll hang on for one fucking second, then I can open this fucking safe and give you your shitty fucking credit chit. Fuck!"

Caleb frowned for a second, her language and assertive tone taking him off guard. But before he could think of how to react, the safe let out a small beep before popping open. The figure leant in and removed something, before turning around to face him. If her language hadn't surprised him, her appearance did. Whoever this was, they weren't what he expected. Sure, he hadn't expected a complete fucking dog, but even with those goggles on he could tell she was pretty decent as far as a merc went, and the complete smug look on her face wasn't doing her any harm, either.

"...You know... shit for brains," she began, looking him up and down. "I'm impressed. Usually mercs give up after about fifteen minutes if I can't kill them."

She stepped forward and he took a step back, shotgun still ready. "Yeah, well I ain't every other merc. Hand it over."

"Apparently not." The woman gave a sigh and held out the chit to him, before stopping herself. "...You know... there's a few hundred thousand credits here. How many of you Blue Suns are there?"

He eyed her hesitantly. "20."

"Well I _know_ I killed two when I docked. So that's 18 including yourself. ...What's your cut like?"

"30%. I get more than the others, they hired me specially." He sounded a little smug when he said this. "Said you'd be a problem. Needed someone to concentrate on you."

The women smirked to herself and crossed her arms. "Should have known you weren't a merc... but 30% isn't a lot, even with those two dead... tell you what, shit for brains... come with me and we'll go halves."

The corner of Caleb's mouth quirked up into a little smile. "Pshht. Or I can shoot you, take the chit, kill every other fucker here and take all of it."

She nodded. "True. You could do that. But it's hard to go anywhere when you're spaced because the ship just blew apart."

Caleb frowned, the grip on his shotgun tightening. "What?"

"Didn't you wonder why I was darting around random parts of the ship and not killing anyone?" She asked, gesturing to her omni-tool. "I was planting C4. Shit's rigged up to my omni-tool and to my vitals. I die, the whole ship blows apart. Other than being a bitching failsafe, it's a great way to make sure there's no survivors afterwards. And it's a fucking laugh and a half to watch. So, again, coming with me?"

Slowly, he lowered his shotgun. This bitch was smart, and now she had him cornered and was asking him to kill the people who just hired him, knowing he'd have the Blue Suns out for him for what'd probably be the rest of his life. ...And Caleb kind of liked that.

"How do I know you ain't gonna shoot me when we clear the place?" he asked, eyeing her suspiciously as she approached him, opening a small canister of something. She tipped out a pill into her hand, throwing it back into her mouth and swallowing it down, before re-capping the canister and putting it back in one of her pockets.

"Because." She smiled, removing her pistol from it's holster. She powered it up, replacing it with a fresh heatsink and inspecting it for damage. "I'm full of adrenaline and Hallex, and when we're done here I'd like to fuck you senseless."

...Caleb definitely liked that.

"Well... fuck." He grinned, eyeing her as she calmly walked past him. "Alright, then. I like your honesty."

"And I like your face. Try not to get it blown off."

–

Caleb rolled over, watching her as sat on the edge of the bed. In the last few hours he'd learnt a lot about this woman, she was a crack shot, could hack anything in her path and wasn't harsh on the eyes at all, but the way the blue light from her control console reflected on her bare skin illuminated some of the scars on her back and made her look like a fucking prize painting. Like her own fucking galaxy map.

"...You're something else." He laughed, watching her down another Hallex, which she was downing by the hour now. "I mean, something _else_. Fuck, the way you're popping that shit I'm surprised you're still sittin' upright."

She smiled and climbed back into bed, wriggling under the covers and next to him, but keeping enough distance so they weren't touching. "Could say the same for yourself. I half expected you to try and steal my ship by now."

"This piece of shit?" he asked, going over the idea in his head. "Nah. Too fuckin' small."

"Fuck you!" She snapped. "This thing's my baby. Could outrun an Alliance scouting ship without even using its boosters."

"Gorgeous, after what we just did, I got a feeling you could outrun a lot of shit."

"Shut the fuck up... and don't call me that."

He raised an eyebrow and glanced over at her, barely moving his head. "What the fuck am I supposed to call you?"

"...Alex."

"Alex?" He scoffed, now blatantly staring at her. "That's a fuckin' _dude's_ name."

Alex's eyes thinned along with her lips. "It's short for _Alexis,_ you fucking douchbag! And what the fuck's your name, anyway?"

Satisfied, he shifted a bit in his position, putting his hands up behind his head. "Alexis, huh? ...Alright, Lexi. Name's Caleb."

"...Don't call me that."

"What? Lexi?"

"Yes, _Lexi. _Makes me sound like some kind of stripper."

Caleb smirked, staring at the wall in front of them. "..._Sexy Lexi._"

"I will fucking murder you!" She hissed, straightening herself up, holding up the blanket to cover herself.

Caleb laughed, watching her warily just in case. This Alex girl was unpredictable, but she was good at what she did and that meant it'd get messy if she _did_ try to kill him. "...Tell you what, I got a job for you, Lexi."

Her eyes thinned at the name and she held her position. "...Go on."

"You ever heard of Carpathia?"

"Of fucking course I have. Carpathian Hallex is the best you can get."

"...Well, I hear they need some shit. It's a basic job, usually a bit below me, but the credits are good and there's probably Hallex in it."

She eyed him, before relaxing a bit. "What's it involve?"

"There's this Salarian base on Atheria, they've got enough of whatever the fuck they put in Hallex to last a year. We break in, steal it and get out before they notice, then take it to Carpathia. I could use a tech head, and you're a crack shot. You in?"

Alex was silent for a second, before shaking her head. "No. ...You don't sneak in for shit like that. You charge in and kill every fucker there. Then you're guaranteed to get all of the stuff unless you really fuck up and blow something up. And I want half your cut, including the Hallex."

Caleb smirked. He _really_ liked this woman. "...Deal."


End file.
